Wednesday, February 24, 2010

The Bull

Today I got a warning from Bort...
"Hey Leslie, don't go into Aubry's field, the bull is out."
Being the sassy trespasser that I am I was like "How do ya know?"
Bort: "He's got a huge ring in his nose with a chain hanging from it."
Me: "Oh, shit."

So, of course I had to go look! No way am I crazy enough to go into the field but I walked down the road along the fence line, to where the cattle's pile of hay usually sits, and found the ring nosed beast right away.
That jewelry makes him look fierce, and not in the hawt mess kind of way, but in the stampeding, kill you kind of way. Bort told me the chain was to keep the Bull from attacking you and that if it decided to plow down the fence and trample me, to grab onto the chain and keep walking it in circles. Luckily this Bull was feeling mellow, cool, and shy. He not only didn't come towards me, but he tried to avoid me - hiding behind his ladies. Then slipped off over the hill.
How emo...


Lou Cheese said...

I wonder if he has any tattoos (the bull with the nose ring, not Bort).

The ones you really have to watch out for are the cows with their babies, they can be very protective and are prone to charge people in that setting, even if the person poses no threat whatsoever.

Excuse me, I mean whateva.

Leslie's Gone Oko said...

Mista' Cheese --->

The tattoo (branding) thing is so yesterday, all the rage now is those yellow ear clips ;)

Seems like on the dairy farms around here the baby cows are separated from their mothers - they have fields of just babies/calves and little plastic-y houses for them to go in at night. The little houses are kinda creepy to me (rounded, tall, grey), like some kind of Phantasm horror shit.

Lou Cheese said...

I was a teenager when Phantasm came out. It was a hit film at the time, because it had all the things a teenage guy wants in his movie: boobies, gore, and at least one fast car.

Men's 70's-era hairstyles sure funny looking back then.

Leslie's Gone Oko said...

i dont know, but those 70's hair styles are tame compared to a ring and chain your nose.
In fact, i think the 70's hair was less cruel. Maybe even cool.