Bad Economy Humor

Terrible, but kinda realistic (click on the pic above to read a larger version)... xoxo

Article by the Asheville Disclaimer.

Humor: Bad Economy = Stealing

Another giggle from the locally written Asheville Disclaimer, the humor section of the Mountain XPress...

Humor: Voting Questions Answered

Another great giggle from the Asheville Disclaimer, putting your burning election questions at ease...

"Questions about voting?
We have the answers! The Disclaimer wants to help you answer any questions you have about the voting process!
Q: Can I vote in my underwear?

A: No, you need to vote in a voting booth. As of 1972, votes are no longer collected from individual undergarments.

Q: If I registered six times in three different counties, how many times can I vote?

A: You are guaranteed at least three votes, but you cannot vote for the same person twice.

Q: I don’t want to vote, but I want/need one of those stickers that says “I voted.” Can I buy one online somewhere?

A: Yes. Please visit Acorn.com for all your voting needs.

Q: I am an avid Obama campaign worker. I keep sleeping with guys and girls who promise me they will vote the Democratic ticket. How far from the voting booth will I need to be in order to exchange sexual favors for votes on election day?

A: The law dictates that you can remain in the voting booth for the entire day, but you cannot make eye contact with any voters."

Humor: Ways To Save Gasoline

Because I can not get enough giggles off of environmental potty humor... Here is another silly list from the Asheville Disclaimer (the pun section of the local paper) :

"Ways to conserve gasoline
• Ride the bus, even if you don’t have to go anywhere, to show your support for fuel conservation.

• Instead of getting drunk and driving your riding lawn mower to the ABC store, take your electric weed eater instead.

• If you’re going to run someone out of town by burning their house down in a “lightning strike,” use wind energy instead of gas-soaked rags to start the lightning.

• When trolling for hookers, carpool with other Johns and share the first hooker you find.

• Put gasoline barrels beneath your home’s gutter spouts, so you’ll be ready when we start drilling offshore and cheap gasoline starts magically falling from the sky.

• Instead of gasoline, huff clean, green paint thinner. "

The Asheville Disclaimer (© 2007) is parody/entertainment-

Please visit http://www.ashevilledisclaimer.com/.

Humor: Pony Tail Man

This humorous article is from the always hysterical and nutty Asheville Disclaimer, the local Onion type paper. Click on the article above to view larger and read! :)